Splintered Pride
by leiko666
Summary: This story focuses on the journeys of a bewitched panther hanyou with remarkable parentage to reunite her extended family and come to terms with herself.
1. Default Chapter

I guess that this wasn't the first time I had been hunted. But I had a sneaking suspicion that it would be the last. I had always been able to extricate myself from nearly impossibly situations. This was obviously the exception to what I had thought was a rule.  
  
I ran nearly blindly through a densely wooded area, wind and branches whipping through my hair. I wasn't running blindly because it was midnight on a new moon. No, I was running blindly out of sheer terror. I'd be the first to admit that while I was most definitely not a creampuff, as it were, I was also totally incapable of dealing with two full-strength, fully mature, extremely well-trained male panther youkai. But that statement is a little deceptive. It might make a more truthful statement to say that I, as an untrained, young and rather emaciated female of the same youkai persuasion, really didn't have a chance, despite my innate tendency to "concentrated violence". I got that phrase from a bear youkai before I killed it, one of my previous hunters.  
  
But that hunt, that meal, was weeks behind me now. Now, I was running for my life. Not uncommon, it is true, but this chase seemed a little more urgent than the last. Why the pair sought me, I don't know. I'm not a particularly impressive specimen. I had never had quite enough to eat, the result being my rather diminutive stature coupled with a delicate-looking frame. On the bright side, years of fending for myself has taught me a great deal that I'm sure I'd never learn about if I were the pampered beasts hot on my trail.  
  
Speaking of whom, they were getting uncomfortably close. My lungs felt like they were on fire, so my only real choices were to stop and make a stand, resulting in my death, or do what comes naturally to a cat: climb, which had a slightly smaller probability of resulting in a rather painful end for me. So, looking around me, I saw what seemed to be the largest tree I had seen in my life. I launched myself up, scrabbling to find purchase on the slick surface of the trunk with my extended claws. Unfortunately, my pursuers were not so green as to fall for that pathetic trick. One leaped up after me, settling on a branch just above me, the other remaining on the ground.  
  
The brown eyes stared down at me with something that was almost pity, but it quickly turned into a scornful sneer. I had time to mutter an explicative before he reached down and grasped my shoulders, and deliberately pushed his hind legs against the tree, pulling me from the tree, falling face-up. Considering the state I was in, it was impossible to maneuver, so I landed heavily, and with a painful thump on the uneven forest floor. A pine cone seemed to have broken a rib, which burned, but in a different way from my lungs. Maybe that wayward rib found a new home, through my lungs.  
  
He landed gracefully, his heavy armor shining in the dim light that the stars provided me with, his tail swaying behind him, like a stalk of wheat swaying gently in the wind. It coiled firmly about his waist, and he kneeled beside me. Keep in mind, I was mildly distracted by the complaints of my ribs. And the back of my head. It felt a little sticky, but this didn't really feel like the right time to investigate.  
  
"Did you really think that you could outrun us, kitten?" That really does sound creepy, until you realize what we were, and how old I was, which wasn't very.  
  
I tried to say something witty and sarcastic, but all I could manage was a dull-groan. Again, his expression was softened by pity. Which really made me want to knee him in the balls. Unfortunately, this was not to be. His partner, unhampered by whatever pity the other seemed to carry, kicked me rather swiftly, somewhere in the vicinity of my head. I've never been particularly sure on this point, as I disappeared into a welcome cloud of darkness. If I was going to die a death like that, I'd rather not be there for it.  
  
But soon, the comforting black faded, and I was left with pain in more places than I thought was physically possible. I opened my eyes and groaned. The light was blinding. I guess it was morning. It hadn't been too far from morning when the pair of panther youkai had cornered me, but I never expected to be alive long enough to see the morning. Just being alive was surprise enough, but when my eyes finally adjusted to the light, I saw what used to be two panther youkai lying in pieces on the pine needles and dead leaves that made up the floor of this forest.  
  
I also saw a rather arrogant grin stretching across the face of a self- satisfied looking kitsune. But don't quote me on that. Things started fading from my vision as I sunk back into the comforting black of unconsciousness.  
  
When I woke again, it was in the dim light of what I assumed was dusk. As I opened my eyes further, I realized that I was actually inside a building, a construct which I hadn't been near in probably over a decade. I reached back to investigate the back of my head. I was concerned about the sticky felling that remained behind my left ear.  
  
The grinning kitsune was nowhere to be seen, but I could smell him, as well as a variety of inuhanyous, a miko, and a few humans somewhere near. Figuring my best bet for survival would be to affect my escape through a conveniently located window, I tried to sit up. I failed miserably, and fell back down onto a worn tatami, my head bouncing on the smooth boards of the room. My ribs throbbed with pain, and I involuntarily cried out, trailing off into a pained moan when I realized how much the sound hurt my head.  
  
The door slid open a few seconds after I made the noise and an Inuhanyou entered. But he smelled...odd. Slightly miko, I suppose. I would have given it more thought, but my right arm took this opportunity to make its complaints. Make its very loud complaints. I moaned again, unable to really put together a coherent sentence in my head, let alone have it exit my mouth intact.  
  
I guess the inuhanyou kneeled next to me and raised my head, because I felt a cool clothe on my forehead, and a bowl at my lips. I was in more pain that I thought possible, (which is really saying something, considering some of the fights I have had) so I did the most logical thing and drank whatever was at my lips. It was water, but had a tangy aftertaste, something I didn't get the chance to contemplate as I lapsed back into sleep.  
  
When I woke again, it was dark, but I felt like I might be able to move. I stood up, and was assaulted by a wave of nausea, dizziness, and pain. I tried to step forward, but my foot encountered something rather soft, and that, coupled with that sudden spell of illness, resulted in my falling face first over a sleeping kitsune. Who, of course, instantly awoke and was on his feet. Thinking me unconscious, he lay me back down on the tatami, and pulled a thick blanket over me. After my little escapade, short as it was, I was too weak to try again. I stared at the ceiling until I fell asleep.  
  
I continued to stare at the ceiling after I woke to an empty room bathed with pale yellow morning light, that is, until the fox youkai reentered with another bowl. His smell was far less confident than it had been the night before, but he again kneeled next to where I lay.  
  
"I am Shippou," he said, obviously intending to continue after that statement, but I never gave him the chance.  
  
"And why do you think I care?" I interrupted, making my tone as confrontational as possible. He colored, and mumbled something about ingratitude under his breath. At this point, I remembered exactly what kind of position I was in; namely, so injured I couldn't move more than three feet.  
  
"Sorry" I muttered.  
  
He continued as though that little tangent had never occurred, "You are in the house of Inuyasha and Kagome. She has decided to care for you until you are well. Please remain in this room unless other wise instructed."  
  
Like hell I would stay in this room like a good little panther. I hadn't spent the last 13 years on my own to be ordered about by a miko and a hanyou I had never met, let alone heard of.  
  
As if sensing my dissidence, Shippou began to speak again. "You'll find it to be in your best interest to remain here. If my father finds you have disobeyed my mother's instructions, his wrath will...not be kind to you."  
  
I snorted, and crossed my arms.  
  
"What is your name, girl?"  
  
I stared over his shoulder at woven wall hanging until the silence began to stretch into uncomfortable minutes. Shippou blushed again, and gently put a hand behind my shoulder to bring me up to a sitting position. He put the bowl into my left hand and allowed me to sip mouthfuls of a stew.  
  
Between sips, I asked the blushing kitsune questions, leaving his unanswered one hanging in the air.  
  
"Shippou, what happened to the two panther youkai pursuing me?"  
  
He blushed yet again, and I wondered if he were capable of doing anything else. "I...well...I...I ummm...I took care of them."  
  
Curious, I continued in this line of questioning. "How did you manage to take care of two panther warriors?"  
  
He looked sheepish. "Would you make fun of me if I said that I used an elaborate illusion to make them kill each other?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Kitsune, why was I saved? It is not the law of youkai, or even humans, to prevent the extermination of...anything." Which was the truth, the truth I had seen played out more times than I cared to think about.  
  
"Mother told me to." He said simply, as I finished the stew. He left the room, and returned with an armful of fresh bandages, a bowl of ointment, and a bowl of water. He announced his intention of changing my bandages, a task I was more than willing to let him do. After-battle infections always made wounds heal badly, as witnessed by the numerous scars covering my legs and torso. I may be demon, but not even that can save my skin from the numerous wounds I couldn't take care of properly.  
  
They fade after awhile, but it always felt like the scars were replaced almost immediately after they vanished into the surface of my skin.  
  
As I contemplated scars, Shippou carefully peeled the blood-crusted gauze from my legs, whose bandaged state had gone unnoticed. Using a square piece of cloth, Shippou tried to wash the dried blood away from the deep gashes. The bowl of water he had carried in with him soon had a distinctly brown tinge. He carefully applied the thick green paste of the ointment and rewrapped my legs. The paste felt cool against the heat of the cuts. But I was getting irritated. I did not need his help. I tried to sit up again, without and assistance from the kitsune, and was rewarded with mind- numbing pain. So I laid back down, as seemed the best option. I had a hard time figuring out why my ribs hadn't hurt like this the night before, until I remembered the water. My shoulder throbbed with almost unnatural amounts of pain, and I realized just how badly I was injured: I had incredible gashes on my legs and all over my torso, multiple broken ribs, and my right arm was probably broken, in addition to at least one serious head injury, as well as injuries I couldn't even begin to consider. My demon nature was helping me faster than one would think, but this would still take a while.  
  
I had a choice. Trust this house of miko and youkai, and allow myself to lapse into a healing sleep, or try to escape to a location better suited for the solitude necessary for healing. I knew little about the people I was now residing with, but I figured my chances were about even for death if I left. I may not be able to trust them, but I would have about the same chance of survival outside as in. So I spoke a few words under my breath, and fell rather gracelessly into sleep.  
  
When I woke up, I could tell many days had passed from the altered smells of the house. The smell of the stew was at least a week old, and fresher, more appetizing scents littered the air in the small room. I moved my right arm, and was glad to find it fully mobile and healed, as were my legs. The back of my head had a thin line where the skin had been broken by the steel toe of the panther's boot, and a heavy knob where the bone had healed itself. My ribs still felt tender, but I could move. A voice in the back of my head breathed a sigh of relief. The last time I had been hurt anywhere near as bad as this, I hadn't been able to lapse into a healing sleep because of the constant presence of humans.  
  
Apparently one of the occupants of the house heard me stir, and the heavy scent of a miko moved closer to the door. A miko (at least a decent one) smells like nothing else, the scent pungent with raw power. The smell has such staying power that a good scenter, like me, can locate where a miko stood several years ago. This miko radiated the smell of power like nothing I had ever encountered before, but that's not really saying much. The only villages I dared enter were those lacking a distinct miko scent. I wasn't going to put my skin on the line for food.  
  
The thin door slide open almost soundlessly, and the miko appeared. She had large, expressive brown eyes, and a pale face framed by long black hair. She looked sweet-faced and young, far too young to be the mother of the kitsune who had cared for me. She stood over me for over a minute, and then gracefully let a hand fall to assist me in rising from the tatami.  
  
"I am Kagome." She stated, not really looking for a response. Once I was on my feet, she beckoned for me to follow her, and we left the cramped room for a slightly larger room where a small group sat cross-legged, drinking tea.  
  
A white-haired hanyou sat on the far side of the table, a vacant seat to the right of him. I could smell the miko all over him. His red robes almost reeked of her. That really makes it sound like she smells horrible, which isn't true. She smelt clean, but not like bathed-clean. She smelled like the way small children smell;" pure, I guess. It was just overpowering. Anyway. Sitting to his left was a white-haired boy, obviously his son, both from the smell (Inu mixed with miko) and appearance. Next to the empty seat sat the kitsune, daintily sipping tea, his tail swishing gently behind him like a rice-paper fan.  
  
Flanking the inuhanyou was a very small boy, again obviously the son of the hanyou. He raised frightened face to take a quick glimpse of me, and rapidly hid his golden eyes under his bangs. I stifled a derisive giggle behind my hand.  
  
Kagome turned, and flicked a finger at an empty seat at the table, next to the kitsune. Despite having spent years without so much as a roof over my head, it did not seem foreign to me to sit cross-legged at the table and quietly sip tea. I attribute it to my excellent instincts and incredible poise. 


	2. Tea & New Clothes

We sat in silence for several minutes. Despite any inner commands to sit still and follow ingrained habit in this situation, my years of wandering took precedence, and I began shifting my weight in a way that can only be described as fidgeting. I extended a claw, wiped it clean, sheathed it, and extended another. Unbeknownst to me, this was making Shippou very nervous, and Inuyasha very irritated (my secondary goal).  
  
"Goddamnit bitch! Stop that!"  
  
I was shocked by the utter lack of originality of the inuhanyou's curses. Honestly, you'd think that someone that smelled of the sort of adventure he smelled of would have something a little more unique up his proverbial sleeve. I sneered at him, but only in my mind. It wouldn't serve me to deride the people, (I use the term loosely) who had rescued me, although it still had no apparent motivation. I quietly sheathed the silvery razors attached to my thin hands and folded them neatly on my lap, doing my best to look demure, if not grateful.  
  
"Girl," said Kagome. It was the beginning of a long, boring monologue, I could just tell. Not that I can remember one. I can't really remember much, but there are some things that I simply don't question my knowledge of, and this was one of them.  
  
"Perhaps 'girl' isn't the best title for you. What is your name?"  
  
I mumbled something incoherent under my breath, making sure it was so low even the hanyou couldn't hear it properly.  
  
"I'm sorry. I didn't catch that. Would you care to repeat it?" he voice was flat, sarcastic.  
  
I mumbled again.  
  
"Look. I didn't send Shippou to rescue you just so you could mumble at me. Answer me! What is your name?"  
  
I didn't see any other option than to tell her the truth, as painful to admit as it was. This was something a human would be ashamed of, because it would separate them from the normal familial structure that rules here, it would prevent them from finding any sort of status. Having no name is tantamount to being worthless, discarded refuse from a family who valued me so little that it didn't even bother to name me.  
  
"I don't know."  
  
The inuhanyou's older son burst out, "How can you not know your own name? What do you call yourself? How do you even get along?"  
  
His dismay at my namelessness was echoed on the faces of everyone at the table, although Shippou's expressed dismay as well as understanding for my earlier reluctance to share my identity. You could almost see the dawning of comprehension reach across his face like the fingers of a ghost casting a shadow on the worn wooden floor of a village house in the light of a waning moon. Ah, to have a keen appreciation for the delightfully tacky melodrama of life...  
  
Back to the situation at hand: I, of course, am deeply offended. They pull this little secret out of me, and they all, including the one that instigated my unwelcome rescue, act like this was something they hadn't even considered.  
  
"I assure you, with the life I lead, a name is unnecessary, and it's quite easy to refer to oneself using first person pronouns only." Where the hell did that little bit of grammatical horror come from? Well, honestly, I have no idea. Just one of those things, like my instinct about Kagome's monologue. Which I could still feel coming in the air, and as much as I regretted what I predicted to be a sleep-inducing cloud of words, I knew it would probably clear a few things up.  
  
"Oookay. Right. Anyway. If you're wondering exactly why I sent Shippou out to find you, it's because I am a miko," she said, eliciting a distinct 'duh' from somewhere in my general location, "and over the years I've gotten my share of visions. The most recent was of you. It rather vaguely showed your location, and impressed the urgency of ensuring your safety."  
  
She continued, but shared no new information. She talked about the panther clans, sharing a remarkable amount of knowledge that would have surprised me, had I not already known about it. Still, actually having something resembling a conversation was relieving. Too often in the past, and real contact was purely the few sentences a stupid youkai uttered before attempting to kill me. They usually lacked the grammar and syntax that would mark them as educated, or at least intelligent. It's a pity that the few intelligent youkai that tried to kill me were trying to kill me. I would have liked to have talked to them. But, understandably, it's difficult to have a conversation in the middle of fighting for your life.  
  
Suddenly Kagome said something that caught my attention.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm sending my eldest son with you. Shippou will escort you until the point when the reason for my vision is revealed. I know that might be awhile, but Shippou needs to get out. He's been spending too much time here."  
  
Shippou looked like he would have liked to object to her assessment, but the rules binding him to the miko as son asked that he not question his parents' decisions. Damn. Another baseless piece of knowledge. I had hoped to figure out where all this stuff came from, but I guess that it simply wasn't meant to be, for the time being.  
  
I wouldn't mind having Shippou along. He was tall, strong and obviously a clever combatant. Totally unlike me. I imagined that having him along would increase my chances of survival. I didn't particularly want his company, but that was more out of habit than anything else. I welcomed his conversation and protection, as much as the need for the latter galled me. Oh well. It was a necessary evil.  
  
I took a glance at the kitsune. His light brown hair floated serenely in a light breeze. I could hear his heart beating faster, and an anxious scent was coming off him in rolls. Was the little foxy-poo frightened of the big bad panther? He looked up from his tea, eyes half-shadowed by thick bangs. He blushed, again, noticing my gaze. I could hear his heart accelerate, and I kept my eyes on him.  
  
The inuhanyou's son broke the silence with a small interjection, "SO, when are you guys leaving?"  
  
The kitsune and I looked simultaneously at the quarter dog-demon, whose expression morphed from discomfort to amusement to outright grinning. It was like he could see something I couldn't. It was absolutely infuriating, his superior grin coupled with his smug golden eyes.  
  
"I couldn't think of a better idea myself mother."  
  
What was this little worm thinking? His smell betrayed nothing other than his self-appointed role as superior, and I could hear nothing out of place in his body rhythms. Goddamn. I settled for cleaning my needle-like fangs with my tongue. They really never caused much damage in battle, mostly because it's difficult to get a good hold on someone's neck, which is all they're really good for, but they're still impressive in their length.  
  
The boy just laughed. I think he was a lost cause, at least for threats. Kagome looked confused, and then pleased with herself when the inuhanyou nudged her in the ribs. What a nudge in the ribs could communicate, I don't know, but it seemed to convey an entire conversation between the two.  
  
I stood up, and walked out huffily. I didn't really feel that putout, but it's always fun to pretend. And it served my purpose. Shippou exited the room seconds after I did. His anxious and concerned scent filled my nose with it's slightly bittersweet smell.  
  
"What's wrong, ummm?" A little blunder on his part. I suppose he wanted to ask me what was wrong, and address it to me using my name, but I didn't have one.  
  
"Nothing. I was just trying to lure you out of there," I said, barely concealed amusement in my tone. A look of annoyance crossed his face, followed by an expression of mirth despite himself.  
  
"Are you always this easy to read?" I asked, leaning forward onto the railing on the narrow porch.  
  
Panic colored his face; it seemed a little bit of an extreme response for the situation, but hell, who knows what a kitsune will do after growing up with mikos and inuhanyous. Look at me, growing up so far, as I have. I'm certainly not normal, and really, could I really be expected to be normal. All the higher youkai I can think of care for their offspring. The lower forms, those without a human form, they usually lay their eggs and move on. Panthers are among the former group, but my childhood really is indicative of the latter. I would be bitter about, but I don't really care enough to put the effort in.  
  
Back to the kitsune. He suggested we return to the small room to finish the tea and possibly set out a plan of action. I didn't need one, but apparently he thought any foray into the unknown would fall apart almost as it began without a plan, in spite of the fact that I was living proof that one didn't need a plan to wander around the western reaches of the north. Oh well. Maybe this meant they'd give me some new clothes. What I was wearing was...regrettable. It really was, considering it was made of the skins stolen off the bodies of whatever I felt in the mood for eating. I had pants, but I only called them that for lack of a better name. I guess I had a shirt, but it was really just a sloppy band of poorly sewn together rabbit fur. Nothing too special, but it sure beat going around with only the flesh the kamis gave me.  
  
But if they would give me real clothes, now that would be worth sticking around for. And more food. Even though I had developed quite a palate for fresh prey, nothing can push well-seasoned and cooked meat from my heart. And vegetables are far more palatable cooked.  
  
As we reentered the room, the inuhanyou's boy gave me a smug look. I tried to fill my response with as much menace as I could muster, but apparently that wasn't enough to threaten the boy. Well, he wasn't really a boy; he was about my age, whatever that was. One downside to lacking even the most basic of memories concerning of my identity. Oh well. Age wasn't a vital statistic in the long run anyhow. I would live longer than this hanyou's son, and probably longer than the kitsune as well.  
  
Ah, the glories of being a panther. I made a rude noise in my mind. I was younger than the kitsune, so it's a given that I'll live longer. And the hanyou's son, while obviously healthy, strong and affected by his miko mother, he's part human. That greatly reduces a life span. It's not through any special-ness on my part that I'd live longer, it was just the chance of nature. Thinking otherwise would be stupid, and probably get me killed. The worst thing you can do in a fight is underestimate your opponent. The second-worst is to overestimate yourself. I shrugged that thought from my mind as the odd family questioned me about my wanderings.  
  
"How far north have you been?" asked the hanyou's son, his voice sounding slightly abrasive after the silken baritone of the kitsune.  
  
"Not very. Every time I come close to getting mildly north, or even merely further inland from my usual haunts, I am hunted. That last pair were the worst though. I was tracking a trading caravan. They had certain...items...I wished to obtain, and I guess I wasn't paying close enough attention to my location. I was a good three miles behind the caravan when they first showed up. Then it was a few days of chase, and then good sir knight Shippou arrived."  
  
The miko looked faintly scandalized at the reasons for me following the caravan. I guess she's never been as low as I am, but when you need something, you need it, and when no one will trade with you, you're left with only one choice: steal what you need. And I needed food and clothing, as well a weapon a little more potent than my natural ones.  
  
The miko made a non-committal noise, and the inuhanyou looked at me with resentment coloring his expression. I guess I reminded him of something in the past. His irritation is understandable. Demon-cats, in general (and with rare exception), are devious, self-serving, violent, cynical, and will kill any human they meet at an opportune moment. While I only qualify for four of the above five, that is no reason to expect a dog-demon to forgive me for my breed's past sins. But judging by the level of dislike I saw in his eyes, the cats must have done something remarkably ambitious, and remarkably stupid. I would have asked, but I'm sure that would equally idiotic.  
  
"Shippou and you will leave tomorrow. The taijya is currently occupied with her own affairs, but the village I am sending you to needs those services." Hmmm. Demon extermination isn't something I've tried before, but I don't mind, really. I have no special attachment to other youkai, just as they have none for me. Youkai, in my experience, are about as cold- blooded as it's possible to get, except for the few higher youkai that are surprisingly human, like the fabled lord Inutaisho.  
  
You should travel some more. Maybe it will trigger some memories. I don't know. But please try to avoid the north, at least for now. And for kami-sama's sake, get some real clothes."  
  
Apparently Kagome has a mouth on her, and uses it often, because this invocation was basically ignored. Shippou's eyes communicated his amusement in his adoptive mother's words, but I was surprised. Her ki was so clean, and so...good...and here she was, casually invoking the name of the kamis. I approved. Being pure of heart was no reason to be naive. And I was going to get real clothes. Hopefully not the sort of garment the miko was currently dressed in; I would prefer a dress kimono to the blue pants and odd "shirt" she was wearing.  
  
"Shippou, take her to the chest in the back room, and get her in something presentable." Kagome's voice was crisp, and brooked no arguments.  
  
Shippou lead me into a small, cramped and dark room at the back of the house, past my sick room. It had a wardrobe with clean lines, the tight grain of the cedar shining brightly in the dim light with the polish spread carefully over it's surface. Beside the wardrobe stood several stacked trunks, and Shippou moved to them. After opening one, he tossed a set of clothing much like the inuhanyou's at me; the blue fabric sliding against the rough skin of my palms. This was not the powerful fire-rat type robe I could smell on the hanyou, but I wouldn't refuse clothing that was actually clothing: I needed it too desperately.  
  
I stared to pull off my furs, but the kitsune stopped me with a yelp. I looked up and watched him exit the room. Who knew? A kitsune who was a prude. My breed may be, on the whole, some of the least desirable of the higher youkai, but none were as free with their sexual favors as the kitsunes. This one must be an anomaly because of his obviously non- traditional upbringing. Really, who ever heard of a hanyou surviving long enough to have children, let alone have children with the most powerful miko I had ever encountered. Oh well. How it happened didn't matter to me; I had received food, new clothes, and a traveling companion.  
  
I walked back into what I dubbed "the tea room" to find Shippou discussing exactly what was plaguing the village in the south. I ignored the conversation, mostly because I didn't care. Life was looking up, and I didn't care to break the perfect shining image I had of it. Shippou, his voice gliding over the words like silk, spoke the only words I heard: "Stupid wolves." 


End file.
